Tuesday, February 16, 2010
♥ a new sort of old kind of struggle.
ah, listening to old blink182 and thoughts of teenage awkwardness come to mind. granted i am still basking in the later stages of it, i can safely say, i am almost an adult.
okay okay, i know i'm going to be 21 in two months, but age has nothing to do with maturity. i do believe i'm quite mature for my age, but i still can't push that awkward pubescent girl who knew so little of herself out of my mind.
life used to be so simple, i fee like everything is coming at me full force and i have no control over anything. i don't know how i feel about this yet. i am proud of myself because i've grown so much and i've gotten to experience way more then other people my age have. but something feels incomplete. i don't know what though.
i think i'm still waiting for the complications of life to disappear. like some gaudy drag queen is going to magically pop out of thin air and say " JUST KIDDING!" and everything will go back to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and running around outside bare foot without worrying about germs and dog pop.
i don't know how i feel about any of this. i really don't. i'm scared of growing up. growing up means more emotions are unlocked, and the current emotions are enough for me.
damn. just let a playa play yo.
okay okay, i know i'm going to be 21 in two months, but age has nothing to do with maturity. i do believe i'm quite mature for my age, but i still can't push that awkward pubescent girl who knew so little of herself out of my mind.
life used to be so simple, i fee like everything is coming at me full force and i have no control over anything. i don't know how i feel about this yet. i am proud of myself because i've grown so much and i've gotten to experience way more then other people my age have. but something feels incomplete. i don't know what though.
i think i'm still waiting for the complications of life to disappear. like some gaudy drag queen is going to magically pop out of thin air and say " JUST KIDDING!" and everything will go back to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and running around outside bare foot without worrying about germs and dog pop.
i don't know how i feel about any of this. i really don't. i'm scared of growing up. growing up means more emotions are unlocked, and the current emotions are enough for me.
damn. just let a playa play yo.
7:16 PM
